Why Cosmopolitan Should Refrain From Giving Any Sort of "Advice"

Cosmopolitan is certainly a magazine with great history, and an icon of American pop culture. Known best for it's freedom to cover female sexual topics, it has set the standard for young women's magazines.
What I find most curious and disappointing about women's magazines is that your choice is one of two selections. You either purchase a racy sexually packed magazine like Cosmo, or you purchase the next extreme of being a home maker in magazines like Good Housekeeping. There is no middle ground. You are either seeking advice of how to remove semen from your hair from the night before and still get him to call you, or you are going to knit a sweater out of your dog's hair while there is a pie in the oven.
Men's magazines are equally biased, however, men's magazines never, ever, promote bowing down and sacrificing self worth for the opposite sex as many female magazine's do. Playboy and GQ would never dare run an article suggesting that a man shut his trap and give in to his girlfriend's every whim. So why is it okay to do this to women?
What disturbs me the most about Cosmopolitan is how it teaches women that in order for a man to even be in a relationship with you, you must follow certain guidelines. You are to give him sex at any given time, even if you have just met him, because there is potential here for a relationship and it will all turn out just fine! Next, after sex you're supposed to serve him (get him water, rub his back) look as beautiful as possible, and then in order to keep his interest, don't call him so he won't think you're clingy even though you just did the most intimate thing possible between two people.
Now, I find many things wrong with all of this, but let me explain why. Is it good and essential to treat your man well? Yes. Should you do all you can to make him happy? Absolutely. In no way am I promoting that women should do nothing and let the man do everything. Here is my point, rubbing his feet and wearing something sexy is all fine and dandy under certain circumstances that I believe many women are lacking.
First off, I do not believe that women should be so giving of their bodies or themselves to a man whom they are not in a relationship with. This is a bare minimum essential. You would not bend over backwards for a stranger, and the man you met at the bar? That's a stranger. Some guy you've met a few times with friends? Still a stranger. Part of the courting process does not entail sex of any kind, or baking, or back rubs. Nothing. This part is for getting to know one another, to see if you're compatible or not, learning each other's hobbies. That is of course, if you are seeking a relationship.
Baking and back rubs comes after the relationship is established. After two people have learned each other's boundaries, about who each is as a person, and choosing to learn more about one another and grow together, seeing where it leads you. To show affection after a good base is established is absolutely necessary from both ends in order for the relationship to blossom and reach it's full potential.
To be so giving towards a man who hasn't even established that he wants a relationship is foolish. It is the same as being super giving to anyone you just met, male or female. It creates the standard that you are easily won without any real knowledge of anything, that few walls are built up around yourself, and that you have low self worth. Everything with people, romantic relationships or not, should be earned.
Has someone shown you that they are with your time, energy, affection? Do you feel this is someone you can open up to? So many many elements go into a successful relationship, and tousled hair and the right shoes have very little to do with it. The bottom line is, sex and affection needs to be earned, not just thrown out for free.
I admit to being guilty of purchasing Cosmopolitan's December issue. Normally it comes with a horoscope booklet for the new year (Yes horoscopes! I know I'm terrible, truly.) But this year, I was jipped of the booklet. Perhaps I was confused and it comes in next month's issue?
Reading through the magazine has led me to believe that Cosmopolitan should refrain from giving any kind of "advice". Its more of a what not to do guide than anything else.
The first article is on singer, Fergie, the cover girl. Discussed in the article is her house, how she looks, how her body changes and if her husband likes it or not, and other senseless information about the woman. No mention is made of her singing career, awards and accomplishments, nothing. Oh, scratch that, there is mention of how she got off drugs. Okay... well! I would think that an established singer would get better recognition in an article over her talents and what she is famous for instead of such superficial nonsense.
Next are "Confessions" embarrassing stories that both men and women have supposedly written into the magazine about, and nasty things they have done to other people. Virtually every story has to do with sex. Apparently the American public is not embarrassed or proud of doing anything that is not crude such as people thinking they've wet their pants or someone discovering condoms and dildos in your luggage.
In one story a woman discusses how her false breast enhancer popped out while dancing with a man in a nightclub. A man writes in offering advice on how to help the situation, and suggests that the girl have "balls" and purchase the gentleman a beer. Now there's a story you can proudly share over the dinner table! Another story is how a woman had her clip in hair extensions yanked out by her boyfriend while they were making out.
The most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me was when I was awarded a certificate from the Senator of my state and I thanked him by calling him the wrong name. I will never allow myself to live it down. No beer or breasts necessary in that story. Although, come to think of it, perhaps I should have bought him one and had balls!
Other articles include, "Hidden Secrets His Hug Reveals". Umm, what? You are going to uncover some sort of secret in the way a man hugs you? Another article talks about how to turn a one night stand into something more. Next, my favorite article, "Make His Number One Sex Wish Come True".
Advice includes but is not limited to writing him a note that discusses your last sexual encounter, and leaving it an unexpected place such as his wallet or freezer, squeezing his butt at a random moment, and locking him in his car for sex. I suppose such things may produce sexual gratification on his behalf, but he may also question your sanity.
I truly hope that the female population will learn that there is no quick way to lock down a man into a relationship. It doesn't matter how beautiful you are or not, if you're wearing the right shoes, if you toss you hair a certain way in bed. It doesn't matter if you call him or not, rub his feet or cook him eggs. The bottom line is that two people, man and woman, need to take the time to get to know one another. Show one another who they are, discover if they like one another, grow together. It's all about who you are upstairs, in your brain, and the kind of person you are, although looking good never hurt anyone. No amount of makeup or sexual acrobats can make up for that.

Dora the Explorer joins the ranks of the Bratz, Bratz still sold on shelves

In 1992, my favorite Barbie of all time was Hollywood Hair Barbie. As the name implies, she had extra long platinum blond locks that could be dyed pink with a spray that was packaged along with a stencil to make stars in her hair. I used to spray so much pink dye that my mother bought me refills to continue to play with her.
I loved brushing and playing with her hair and admiring how beautiful she was and hoping one day I could grow up to be like Barbie and be so beautiful and have so many things to do.
Though I did not realize it at the time, Barbie was a vehicle the cosmetics industry had used to help me feed into them when I was of age. An age that seems to lower as the years go on.
The doll was supposed to teach me that changing hair is "fun" , that to be beautiful is to be acceptable, and the list goes on.
Although I am a normal college aged woman who enjoys her fair share of shoe shopping and makeup, I'd like to think that I haven't fallen slave to the cosmetics industry as it is so easy to do. I do not even wear makeup everyday and I loathe "changing" my hair, mostly because I've begun to go gray and its a pain in the neck to maintain. I find no joy in picking out lipstick because my skin tone is impossible to match to anything. But thats a whole other story all it's own.
The Barbies of the late 80's and early 90's and many years previous are very different from the Barbies now, and certainly drastically different than the Bratz dolls. So you can imagine my disappointment when I first became aware of the "new" Dora, a tween doll, entitled Dora Links. Although the cartoon version and doll are both rather adorable, I see major flaws. The original Dora was always seen drawn with her backpack, and map for exploring. The new Dora comes with... jewelry?
The major point of the doll is to change outfits, her hair can grow or become shorter, and here's the real kicker, you can change her unfavorable brown eyes to a beautiful blue! Dora is supposed to be Latina, but we're going to encourage young Hispanic girls to want to change their eye color. Nice move Mattel.
Dora also will now be limiting her exploring to a virtual city along with her shopping buddies, oops, I mean friends. I guess we won't be needing that map or unfashionable talking back pack any longer. They do after all promote exploring and broadening your horizons beyond how you look. I am curious to know if the new Dora will continue to incorporate Spanish words in her vocabulary, but perhaps being white and beautiful comes with growing up and being acceptable.
The new Dora joins the ranks of the ever horrific Bratz dolls. Bratz dolls strongly resemble pornography stars with botched surgery. They have unusually large round heads, enormous pouty lips, and tarty outfits. I recall my cousin owning one years ago that was supposed to be a pirate of sorts. It had platform dominatrix style boots and a belly shirt with all that makeup painted on. Not to mention how catty and unfriendly the faces painted on are. Gone are the smiling dolls of the 90's, they have been replaced with pouty large headed harlets.
The Bratz line is not limited only to dolls, they have lines of beginner's makeup, including lip glosses and hair dyes. Children are highly suggestible, and to suggest that a look that is in such poor taste is desirable is rather horrifying to me.
Barbie has gotten a poor reputation amongst parents and feminists, and usually for good reason. Her proportions are unrealistic and such a look is not one to aspire to unless you wish to walk on all fours. However, I must say that Barbies at least have dolls that have respectable themes.
As a child I had Barbies that were vets, doctors, teachers, even a space woman. Granted they always had senseless ones that were beach themed, but at least it promoted something.
To this day Barbie recently came out with a line of all African American dolls, entitled So in Style, some of which come with classical instruments for the doll to "play", whereas Bratz has very small minded themes, if you can even call them that. Bratz dolls are reminscent of girls when they play dress up for Halloween, their outfits are very tiny and very sexy, but you cant quite distinguish what they are supposed to be.
In 2008 Mattel filed a lawsuit against MGA, the creators of the Bratz dolls for infrigement, and was awarded $100 million. Originally the verdict also stated that the vile dolls would be pulled from shelves after the holiday season ended, but being as MGA still continues to fight against it, no such action has been taken.
In conclusion I will say that the only truly respectable dolls I see on the market are the Only Hearts Club dolls, which can be found here: http://www.onlyheartsclub.com/. They are cute dolls with no hint of sexuality, as it should be. I hope that these will become more popular as the overly sexualized dolls continue to be challenged and protested against. No child should even be thinking about their looks or makeup or outfits. At least not until they are a bare minimum age of 14.
I hope in the future that young girls will be given empowering role models, women who do great things that have greater value than how they look. As Judge Judy once stated, "Beauty fades but dumb is forever," Touche.

Sally and the Pumpkin Patch

So I was watching "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown", my favorite Halloween special of all time. How enjoyable it can be to regress to a better time in one's life. However I always find when I watch movies and such from the past I greater understand a theme in the movie, or somehow missed pieces that my younger mind could not comprehend at the time.One I must have missed but fully realize now was Sally in the pumpkin patch with Linus. She is enamored with Linus and decides to go along with him into the pumpkin patch after he's sweet talked her about the whole deal. And there they sit the whole night. At first they are both happy and she is waiting for the Great Pumpkin to arrive as promised, this whole great big deal. She even stands up for him at some point in the night when everyone comes to make fun of them and remind Sally about the party and all the fun she's missing. But she does turn around and ask him when the hell that Great Pumpkin is going to show up because they've been out there all night and they've done little more than stare at one another.As we all know, the Great Pumpkin never shows up although Linus is busy yelling to Sally as she huffs off that he is definitley going to come any minute now if they just wait a little longer but she's finally realized that he isn't coming. Only problem is she missed Halloween. Poor Sally, she should have gone and enjoyed Halloween and let Linus do his dreaming and not wasted her time getting wrapped up in it all. I'm not projecting here or anything...

Nikki Catsouras Family Website Gone, Pictures Still Remain

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